Is honesty always the best policy? I am beginning to wonder. Should we always tell those closest to us what we really think? That line that defines the boundaries between honesty and cordiality is a very subjective barrier and even coming close to it can often lead to a minefield of broken trust, hurt feelings and the ever constant threat of dissolution.
There are of course those things about which we are never honest. The small favors we grant each other, "No, it doesn't make your butt look big", "Of course he like you!", are deemed acceptable because they reinforce the bonds of camaraderie and bolster self-esteem, but what happens when we give up a part of ourselves to be there for the other person?
In a relationship, we call it compromise, which as a concept sounds good. A sharing of mutual ideals, if you will. But when that sharing, that compromise, becomes one sided we begin lying not only to the other person but to ourselves. Convincing ourselves that we really want what our friend or our spouse wants because fighting against that force has become too much and clawing our way back seems impossible.
I cannot help but wonder if coming clean, laying it out, and telling the other person is more damaging and ultimately more painful than breaking free would be. And once free, is it possible to avoid that particular pitfall in the future?
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